fanficWorld| JayBird -- General -- Posted: 19/09/2013 -- Updated: 23/09/2013 |
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Gasparde de Grasse and her friends stepped out of the portal into Mordor. "Oh I don't like it here," said Monty.
"Me neither," said Alice, "even though I can fly here." To demonstrate she flew up into the air, and didn't bang her head on anything."
Agent Suicide was there too.
"I don't like it either," said Gasparde, "but sometimes in the PPC we have to go places we don't like. We are here to look at a VERY SAD story.
The fanfic was called 'A Powerful Love', and it started like this:
Frodo stumbled over a rock, weeping. "There is no hope," he said, "no hope at all."
No-one was there to hear him. After Sam had died freeing him from the Orcs, he was all alone, out in the desert of Mordor. The Ring was heavy now, whispering in his ear like a malevolent babysitter. There was no hope. No hope at all.
But... far, far above, in the dark sky, a single star gleamed. Lying on his back, Frodo stared up at it: it was Alpha Centauri, his favourite star, the one he had spent all night staring at once with his beloved she-Hobbit, Sunflower-Jay.
And all at once it was as if Sunflower-Jay was there with him, lying on the black sand of Mordor. In his mind she turned to look at him, her lips full, her eyes wide. "There is always hope, Frodo," she said, looking him right in the eyes. "Even in the darkest hour..."
"Yes," Frodo said weakly, and then, again, "Yes!" He staggered upright, his eyes fixed on the single star. "There is still hope!"
"Wow," said Thranduil the mini-Balrog, "that is a really powerful story."
"It should be!" Alice pointed out. "It's called 'A Powerful Love'!"
Agent Suicide was there too.
"Then that is a good title for it," agreed Thranduil. "I really want to find out what happens to Frodo next, and whether he ever sees his beautiful girlfriend Sunflower-Jay again."
"I'd like to, too," said Gasparde, smiling at her friends, "but we have to go on and look at the next story."
"BUT WAIT!" said Monty. "Gasparde, what about the score?"
"Oh yes!" gasped Gasparde. "I nearly forgot. You are such a good friend, Monty."
"I know," said Monty modestly.
Agent Suicide was there too.
"So I think this story is really good," Gasparde decided, "and because it is so good I think it deserves a score of 9/10!"
"Wow!" said Thranduil. "That is a really good score. Do you think there are any better stories out there?"
"I don't know," Gasparde explained. "I think we should go and find out."
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A/N: Soooo i hopr you ard enyoying my sotry!! who iz yuur favourit characte?? Do YOI thing Suiside is hott? (LOL imeam ARGENT Cuicide, not killig yoursefl!)
| Cyber-Observer |
| The mini-Balrog deserves a spin-off. Why can he talk? Why is he there? Why is he the only one analyzing the story when there are four people who could be doing that? Frodo would make five, but he's doing something else. Does the mini-Balrog really agree with female-Gaspard, or is he just pretending to agree with her so that she doesn't feel bad about her decision?
THESE ARE IMPORTANT QUESTIONS. Also, was Suicide there the whole time, even before they came in? It sounds like he was waiting for them by where Frodo was. Was he stalking Frodo? Another important question. Kind of freaky, too, if he was. |
| TheGreatDestroyer |
| What in the name of...
Fistly, you're quite mistaken in the gender of your protagonist. Last I checked on the wiki, Gaspard De Grasse is a male. MALE. X-FREAKING-Y. Are you seriously as inept as to ignore basic things like gender in your character descriptions? I shall deduct a thousand points from your score. Next, your character s are about as flat as a sheet of monoatomic paper. I could tell a better story with sock puppets. Worn on my feet. Inside shoes. Silently. In sock-puppet mime. Minus another thousand points. Oh look, you're already clocking in at -1990/10. What's the next item? Oh right, talking animals. -(10^10000). The one redeeming aspect of your story is Agent Suicide. For that, I award you a billionth of a point. +(10^-9) Please stop. TheGreatDestroyer |