Title: twilit in the PPPC!
Author: Lady Cyskia
Category: PPC
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Romance
Summary: itz so unfair dat no1 ppcs 4 twilight!!! y duz evri1 h8 it so mch??? Dis fic iz about how REEL VAMPRISE liv&wrk in ppc hq & y FLWRS SHULD LIK IT MUR!!!
A/NN: TWilight iz grATE!
&GUESS WHAT? the title is abigulous - that mesns it haz 2 meanins. #1 is b/c twiliht chracters r in da PPC & 2) b.c 'tiwlight' meanz end uf daytime&strt of night & is metaforical of sumthin ENDING & TE PPC IZ ENDIN!!!!!!!1!111!! (oops did i just giv away the endin?? Heheeeeeheeee...)
1 day a lonly ppc agnt who wuz in trubl w/flowersz 4 killin a sue wit a flamethrowr (Suez r bad alllrite???? & i know every1 thinks beellas a sue bt she's NT!) got assined 2 a mizsion in teh twiligtvherse as punshmetn. er name wus jasiminie.
jasimine was a normal good lookin but nt perect lookin agent (SEEEE? NOT A SUEE!) 'n she kinda liked TWiglith but had 2 say nuthin b/c otherwiz the othr agents&flowers wood LAUGH @ her & sum mite even kill er so she had 2 b carful.
jasimine was asigned t2 kill a marysue whod snucked in & made emmet love her 4evar & made roseli go way (the B1#CH!). jasimine squshed the sue under a bolder & remembred 2 read out teh charges 1st so she culdnt get in truble w/flowers again but wen she had 2 kil the replcemnt emmet she culdnt b.c all vamipres R soooo atractiv & hot
so she strted cryin
"whats wrong" asked emmet givin her a big hug
"im spposed 2 kil u but i cant" asid jasimen
"then dont said emmet & laufed lika bear & made jasimen lauf 2
"y wood u half to kil me nyway?; asked emet
"b/cause its my job & thflowers wil kil me if i dnt"
"then lets kil the floers ourselfs hmm?" i alywas h8d grdening. any roses i always hat8d roses"
"youd relly help me? asked jasiminnne. "sure i wuld" said emmet
so tey went back thru de portl & used flmethrowrs 2 burn ALL the FLORWERS to CRISPIS & emet bit jasimine & she bcame a vamprei 2
& DEY LIVED HAPPLY EVR AFA!
(A//N see thats wut 'twilit' mens 4 the ppc but off corse i dont hat the ppc myselvf its jus wat emmet and jazimine wuld do b/c its in chreacter, u know? dont wurry theyll not hurt agnts only those who mke fun of twilight (whic u guyz wont RIIIIITE??????!?!?!?!?!?!))